Every night at bedtime, when the lights are turned off, the monsters come out...scary two headed dragons, orange and red caterpillars, silvery snakes, bats and ghosts. That’s what happens to Angie in the delightful children’s book Monsters in Your Bed...Monsters in Your Head (Jazz the DreamDog T)
The book resonates with children and adults alike because we all seem to wrestle with monsters. Rainey, et al, has written a very comforting and empowering story that lets youngsters know that those monsters are not real, but in their heads, and that they have the power to conquer them.
The Monster you must conquer to be successful is your limiting beliefs. Those things you believe to be true about yourselves which limit you. That belief that scares and entraps you. That fear that eats at you.
Just like children have all kinds of different scary monsters under their bed, in their closet, or coming through the window, adult’s monsters exist in all shapes and colors too. They can also keep you awake imagining all kinds of worst scenarios.
Examples of adult’s monsters
The other day I was working with a client. We were discussing how as a manager he needs to let his voice be heard when he is in meetings with his superiors. He recognizes his tendency is to “wait and see,” instead of interacting more actively. When I asked him:
“what is stopping you from speaking up?” he paused and then said:
“What if they don’t like my viewpoint? I don’t want to look like a fool!”
That's his Monster.
Even though he usually has very good ideas, and his superiors regard him highly enough to be considering him for a stronger leadership role, the monster in his head tells him: “Be careful. You don’t want look like a fool.”
A couple of months ago coaching another client, a vice-president in an organization, about a person in her management team who continuously insinuates that because she is a woman, she can’t be as effective as her predecessor. I asked:
“Why do you allow it?”
“I suppose I’m too much of a nice person,” she answered. I let a moment go in silence. She continued, “I’ve always had a problem with having to be extra nice.”
That's her Monster.
When we took a closer look at her monster we were able to think of a way in which she could still be nice, without allowing this person to disrespect her.
My Monster
A few years back I had my own Monster. I was working for other people, while taking care of my business in a limited way. My monster was: “If I work full time for myself, I will not be able to cover my bills.” At the time I was divorced and on my own.
When I examined my monster more closely I realized that what was preventing me from having more success in my business was that I could not dedicate more time to it. When I conquered my monster, I was able to focus all my energy in growing my business. By helping others, I also helped myself.
Your Monster
Limiting beliefs are the monsters we create and carry around in our minds. Those beliefs are usually based on experiences we have had in the past, things people in our lives have said to us repeatedly, or fears you have picked up along the way. No matter their origin, it can derail your career and limit your success. Everyday I help people name and conquer their monsters. You could be the next person I help.
Share your thoughts
What’s the Monster you need to conquer now? Have you conquered other monsters before? Share your comments and stories with us.
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Photo by: bredgur